Sunday Bloody Sunday !

mickthechippy

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What is it with Inanimate objects and sundays

woke up this morn with no mechanical help, the alarm clock by the bed showing just past 5am when the battery gave up the ghost as to propelling the arms around, shrug of the shoulders and a quick search, had it replaced with one of the perfectly good batteries that the camera refuses to work with, jobs a good un

round one, and Im still in the game

dressed then Coffee, and out with himself, around the top field and back again, only for him to decide that the lush green grass of the said field wasnt the place that he desired to relieve himself of solid waste, but the ratty old half bare ground of the bit of edging to the pavement on the way back,

no worries, just reach into the pocket for a londis carrier bag and pick the offending poop up............................. No cant do that, the couple that I had stashed in the going out warmies jacket wasnt there, the pocket was empty, dunno where they are but they aint there, tried to flick the foul smelling dog dump down the nearest road drain with a stick that wasnt quite fit for purpose

round two and staggering from a body blow, but grappling close and still in there

got things to do, have to be over to the grandchilds this morn, picking em up to come avisiting, doing em dinner and hopefully finding them a bit of shopping while we are out,

up to the bathroom for the ablutions, naked as the day I was born, in fact nakeder as theres no longer that inch of flesh on the end of the pleasure rod, Im into the shower, gawd all the devils in hell have attacked me, proper near screamed ! the wide reaching spray is stone cold freezing, how come it takes a few good seconds for that to register ?????

out, still naked but now rather damp, the hot knob on the shower is whacked up to the max, no, that aint a working, off with it all and back on, still no heat, shivering now, rub dry with the towel and back on with a t shirt and kecks,

off to the boiler, red lights on denoting a fail to fire up, off with the leccy supply and back on again, Ha Ha success ! yellow light blazing, all is good, back to the bathroom and repeat process one, in and things are looking good, this time Im soaked with warm water, great, but thats just the gods buggering with me, its getting cooler, just before the liquid ice comes through again, more screams and leaping out, run to the boiler and the red lights winking at me, instant fix is tried, but to no avail,

FFS !, dry myself off, get dressed and look for the service book, found and try firing it up again, no aint having it, though the flickering lights give me a fault code, mmmmh, can my fix that, searching more now, the little box with all the funny screw heads is found, selecting the right one, the fixings for the boiler cover are removed, fault traced and its gonna require a drain down on the hot water side, never mind, can do that, though I aint got the part required to be changed

still Ive got heating, so switching the boiler to just heating, and no I aint, its koofed, no heating either

round three and Im on the ropes gasping !

ring the family and explain the dilemma, no heating and they have a tiny baby so its no go today,

ponce around on the pooter looking up the part using the number, hopefully celsius heating spares will have one in stock come monday

ponce on the pooter a bit more, various sites, then fancy a bit of a munch, its getting past midday now

got a couple potatoes, stabbed the living hell out of em with a fork and stick em in the oven for an hour or so on gas mark 5, sorted, leave the kitchen door open so any heat from the oven drifts through the house, make more coffee !

sat sitting watching all the joyful news on the one eyed monster in the sitting room for the required time and back up for to sort my scoff, open a can of beans, sprinkle a few chilli flakes in the pot, grate myself some cheese and into the oven for the baked spuds

ceptin they aint baked, they aint even warm, they are as they went in, the ovens failed to ignite, mucho cursing ensues, and I mean mucho,

traces the fault, somehow, hell knows how, the switched plug that deals with the piezo ignition has the plug not fully pushed home, How that happened god only knows as its behind the cooker out of sight and mind

This round I took the Ten count and started again
 
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Peter

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Hope you get it sorted fella but thanks for the report. Mr's M has just given me the "Look" and enquired why I'm sat looking at the laptop convulsed with laughter. :LOL: :ROFLMAO:
 

Dave

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Some days it's just best to get back into bed, pull the covers over, and go back to sleep :D
 

emmaemma

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" naked as the day I was born, in fact nakeder as theres no longer that inch of flesh on the end of the pleasure rod "

That line made me chortle....... :ROFLMAO: :ROFLMAO:
 

Dave Spence

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If they'd ta
" naked as the day I was born, in fact nakeder as theres no longer that inch of flesh on the end of the pleasure rod "

That line made me chortle....... :ROFLMAO: :ROFLMAO:
If they'd taken an inch off mine I would be posting as Davinia Spence:cry:
 

Dave Spence

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You will beat it in the re-match mate.

It just goes to prove that Sunday's are ONLY for fishing:D
 

Pompous git

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Mick, been with Swale for five years now, been good. Got fed up with cowboys wish I had gone over to them a decade ago.
 

mickthechippy

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Picked up the part thats required for my ancient boiler

mush behind the counter, joked that its been there so long he's gotta run a check for the Black death on it

at present draining down,
 

mickthechippy

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drained, new part clipped out, only held in by a spring clip, new bit fitted, refilled and kaboom, the house blew up

Im warm now though
 
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