Spanky's thread

spanky

Irregular Member
Site Supporter
Joined
Aug 28, 2007
Messages
8,927
My ancestors have all had a genetic propensity for diarrhoea...

Runs in the family.
 

spanky

Irregular Member
Site Supporter
Joined
Aug 28, 2007
Messages
8,927
Weird: People in my office have started naming the food in the company fridge...

Today I ate a tuna sandwich named Kevin
 

spanky

Irregular Member
Site Supporter
Joined
Aug 28, 2007
Messages
8,927
When my mate started losing his hair, he got a wig...

We didn't notice at first, it was done syrup-titiously.
 

spanky

Irregular Member
Site Supporter
Joined
Aug 28, 2007
Messages
8,927
I've been a member of Total Fitness for a good 10 years now but don't seem to be making any progress...

so tomorrow I'm going down there in person to see what's going on
 

nomorelongwalks

Mark Spitz
Site Supporter
Joined
Nov 29, 2005
Messages
7,058
I had a leak in the bathroom the other night, looked through Yellow pages, found a plumber, John the plumber 24hrs.
Called him up and he came round to have a look, an hour later the leak was worse and water was beginning to come through the ceiling.
I ran upstairs and said to him "it's getting worse, how long have you been a plumber??"
He replied "24hrs"
 

spanky

Irregular Member
Site Supporter
Joined
Aug 28, 2007
Messages
8,927
I know Ozzy Osbourne has a terrible affliction that's gonna blight the poor man for the rest of his life...

but being born in Birmingham isn't really his fault is it.
 

spanky

Irregular Member
Site Supporter
Joined
Aug 28, 2007
Messages
8,927
I had a croissant for breakfast today...

followed by an annoyed worm and a miffed beetle
 

crackatoa

Regular member
Site Supporter
Joined
Jan 18, 2015
Messages
5,428
On the M56 and my wife says 'Those people in front are Welsh'. 'Why?' I said. 'Well the kids are writing on the window "stit ruoy su wohs".
 

spanky

Irregular Member
Site Supporter
Joined
Aug 28, 2007
Messages
8,927
I had life-changing surgery to fix my neck...

I haven't looked back since.
 

mickthestick

Hod job
Site Supporter
Joined
Aug 9, 2004
Messages
4,793
I'm not saying my girlfriend is thick but when I ask her to spell orange she said the fruit or the colour
 

mickthestick

Hod job
Site Supporter
Joined
Aug 9, 2004
Messages
4,793
The Wife just said , Mick that bloke keeps looking at my Boobs , I said just pull your skirt down a bit more love
 

spanky

Irregular Member
Site Supporter
Joined
Aug 28, 2007
Messages
8,927
Just been to Liverpool and I couldn't believe they didn't sell Mars Bars.

They love the rest and play bit, but they don't want to take a chance on the other.
 
Top