Really struggling tonight

[Dave Spence]

Tomorrow is the completion of the family home sale. Myself, my brother and sister will be a lot wealthier but it is very bittersweet. Ken was always trying to give me money but I would never accept it, now, it would appear, I have no choice. I would swap it all for just another hour with him.

 

[Browner]

I have been through it too. It’s tough but just got to think that it’s time for new family memories to be made by a new family.

 

[Stewie74]

You could always use some or all of it on things that would have made him happy. A donation to a cause that he was passionate about for example, or a trip to some of his favourite places

 

[Pompous git]

Hard to put into words feelings towards a home. A house is often more than just four walls.

 

[Northantslad]

Fair play Dave.

 

[Me and my lad]

A house is just walls and a roof....it is nothing without people. Sadly people are not with us as long as we would like. Since my dad passed in July I have revisited places we would go. I even had a bet at Market Rasen races in memory of him (not a fan of race meets)...it won too!
I even took my partner to Bridlington for fish and chips on the South beach...bizarre when I live near Grimsby

 

[Peter]

Ken was always trying to give me money but I would never accept it, now, it would appear, I have no choice.

Dad's always find a way of having the last word Dave.
Bless him, he'll be looking down with a smile on his face.

 

[Lee Richards]

Dave,

From your words in the past it seems you were close so I will presume he would have done his best to have been there for and provided all that you needed when he could.

Now he has gone with the rewards from his provision he will continue to do the same and with the money go and buy yourself some trees that will be a legacy and reminder that will see out the rest of your days.

 

[Browner]

Dave,

From your words in the past it seems you were close so I will presume he would have done his best to have been there for and provided all that you needed when he could.

Now he has gone with the rewards from his provision he will continue to do the same and with the money go and buy yourself some trees that will be a legacy and reminder that will see out the rest of your days.

With my inheritance I was able to help my son get his first place, which I believe the family would approve off. It’s the wheel of life.

 

[minkyandbear]

I understand your feelings Dave old chap.

On the day of completion of my late parents house, which had been the family home to my brother, sister and various dogs and cats for almost forty years, I went back for one last time.

I made myself a large black coffee and sat on the back patio for an hour or so and just reflected on all the life that had coursed through the family home over those years.

 

[Kev86]

I've been through what you are going through Dave and I feel for you, just remember the good times you had with your Dad and believe he his looking down on you.

 

[warrington63]

With my inheritance I was able to help my son get his first place, which I believe the family would approve off. It’s the wheel of life.

My dad specified a percentage of what his bungalow was worth to give to each of my 3 lads in his will.
He always said they would benefit more from that than say a couple of thousand each.
It was 6 years since he passed away and over 20 for my mum, I still think of them especially when I go up to Warrington.

 

[warrington63]

Dave if you need someone to talk to, send me a pm with your number.
I am sure others on here will say the same.
Thinking of you mate

 

[david white]

Dave, you say in your post that you ‘ would swap it all for just another hour with him ‘ !
To be fair Dave from reading many of your previous post I think deep down you know exactly what would be said in that ‘ another hour ‘
“ Shoulders back, chin up, cherish the memories but above all create new ones with those that are still with you, make me proud son “
Trust me it may not be word for word but that’s what I envisaged my dad saying to me and eventually it does help

Onwards and upwards my friend

 

[Wrongfoot]

It's no longer a conflict. You won't be taking from him, by accepting the benefit now. Reading your posts there's no way he thought you were mercenary and you have to realise that he'd want you to have a share of what was his now. Do something with it that makes you happy as a consolation for your loss.

I find it heartwarming to read your posts about him. No shame in caring or grieving. All the best.

 

[Me and my lad]

Sat here with tears flowing, all the advice is spot on Dave. I loved the tree comment. Made me reflect even more. This site is Brill.

 

[The Landlord]

Been there Dave.
Me & the missus lost our mums quite close together. With some of our inheritance, we bought the pub.
My mother would have a duck egg if she knew. She was a strict teetotaller & hated the fact that me & dad enjoyed a pint.

 

[rudd]

Tomorrow is the completion of the family home sale. Myself, my brother and sister will be a lot wealthier but it is very bittersweet. Ken was always trying to give me money but I would never accept it, now, it would appear, I have no choice. I would swap it all for just another hour with him.

You could always buy an engraved in memory bench or the like.
Can then spend reflection time with him.
FFS, started me off now thinking about my Father in law.