Phunny Phobias

Trogg

the bouncer
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I have a friend who is scared cr4pless of clowns (coulrophobia)🤡🤡, she is that bad we were at a heavy metal gig in Stoke and this huge shaven silverback was stood next to her, she suddenly screams and throws her drink over him.

Me, thinking the guy had grabbed her somewhere he shouldn't immediately fronts up to the guy ready to teach him why he shouldn't do that.

Mary grabs me, shaking she pulls me away and trying to apologise to the guy without actually looking at him.
It was a change over between bands so it was quiet and the crowd have turned to see what's going on.

Eventually Mary raises her hand and still not looking points at the guys arm....he's got a full colour tattoo of Captain Spalding (Sid Haig) on his bicep, Mary had turned and was at eye level with it and just freaked out 🤣🤣

I had to apologise to the guy while Dian takes her outside to 'recover', i explain to the bloke what had happened and he burst into laughter (thank god cos he probably could have slaughtered me 😳😳) , puts his jacket on, goes outside and asks if Mary was alright then gives her a hug and offers to buy another drink.

He spent the change over talking to her because he'd never met anyone with a fear of clowns 🤣🤣
 

davylad

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Had to explain to an old work colleague that vertigo is a symptom of fear of heights and not a phobia itself.
Vertigo is an illness Zerk, not a fear of heights. My mucker suffers with it, and it can be horrible at times for him. He goes dizzy and says everything is spinning round, it can sometimes last for a while too.

I can be a bit claustrophobic at times, not sure what brings it on but sometimes I wake up, and have to go to a window and look outside and get the feeling of air and space. Slow deep breathing gradually takes it off, but it's not nice, a feeling of panic. I found it hard to sit in the rear seats of a three door car at one time, thankfully not had any problems for a few months or so.
 
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Zerkalo

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Vertigo is an illness Zerk, not a fear of heights. My mucker suffers with it, and it can be horrible at times for him. He goes dizzy and says everything is spinning round, it can sometimes last for a while too.
That's sad to hear. This chap was confusing it with Acrophobia (fear of heights).
 

Arry

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My lass has a fear/dislike of Mascots... y'know ? people dressed as animals.... as an Essex cricket fan, she can't stand it when the Eddie and Ellie the Eagle mascots come round
 

Peter

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A rather large Yorkshireman and one of the founder members on here @Stu ..............................Mice 🐁

That is all.
 

NobbyHall

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I worked with a women who had a phobia of twins. I saw this first hand and the hysterics and tears was something to behold.
 

Robwooly

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Always makes me laugh that the fear of long words is:
Hippopotomonstrosesquippedaliophobia
This is actually true - Fantastic fact, it's like those collective words for groups of animals, good to see a sense of humour amongst those who name these things.
 

warrington63

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It's a wonder I ain't got a fear of needles.....:oops:.....Bloody severe bruising on the backs of both hands and one arm after having covid booster jabs and the like this last week....:LOL:.....I drink a cup of tea and most of it deposits of the floor like a sprinkler system!:ROFLMAO:
 

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RedhillPhil

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I'm not very clever with spiders. Not arachnophobia as such, I just don't like 'em.
 

Robwooly

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As a young lad I had a phobia of girls, it was like they were from another planet, if you have no confidence and below average looks when you are young you have no chance, nowadays it's fine and I'll give plenty of chat, have a good woman - yes I can't work that one out either, it's amazing how you can go from one extreme to the other though.

Recently developed a fear of potatoes, which is proper weird but like most phobias justified, I can eat them and touch them but if I cut one open there's something in it that causes a bad allergic reaction, took a few years to work out what was causing this so now it's a spud free house I live in. Frozen tatties/chips are ok though so not all bad.
 

banksy

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I'm not very clever with spiders. Not arachnophobia as such, I just don't like 'em.
When I was young, our old farmhouse had large attics full of wonderful stuff, from WW2 gas masks to Victorian marble clocks to 1930's school photographs of my parents - framed photos about 24' x 18" with all the staff and all the pupils in them.
Rooting around in a big wooden flour bin one rainy day, I came across some of my Dad's flying records. He was a WW2 RAF pilot, mostly on Halifax planes, and there was some interesting stuff.
But even more interesting to a teenage lad was a copy of "Health & Efficiency" which I found secreted between the pages of a flying manual.
I shoved the magazine up my jumper, then slid it between my bedsheets for later consumption.
That night in bed, when all was quiet in the house, I tucked the blankets in all around me, and turned on the little torch which I'd smuggled in.
Despite the airbrushing of the ladies' bits, this was something else!
But turning another page revealed the biggest hairy spider, which shrugged, looked annoyed, and ran straight towards me.
I leapt back in horror. Or rather I tried to leap back, but was restrained by the heavy, tucked-in blankets. Not daring to shout out, I thrashed around for a few horrible seconds before making my escape. Shaking, dripping with sweat, took me ages to calm down.
It didn't put me off ladies' bits, but I still hate bloody spiders. :oops:
 

Arry

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When I was young, our old farmhouse had large attics full of wonderful stuff, from WW2 gas masks to Victorian marble clocks to 1930's school photographs of my parents - framed photos about 24' x 18" with all the staff and all the pupils in them.
Rooting around in a big wooden flour bin one rainy day, I came across some of my Dad's flying records. He was a WW2 RAF pilot, mostly on Halifax planes, and there was some interesting stuff.
But even more interesting to a teenage lad was a copy of "Health & Efficiency" which I found secreted between the pages of a flying manual.
I shoved the magazine up my jumper, then slid it between my bedsheets for later consumption.
That night in bed, when all was quiet in the house, I tucked the blankets in all around me, and turned on the little torch which I'd smuggled in.
Despite the airbrushing of the ladies' bits, this was something else!
But turning another page revealed the biggest hairy spider, which shrugged, looked annoyed, and ran straight towards me.
I leapt back in horror. Or rather I tried to leap back, but was restrained by the heavy, tucked-in blankets. Not daring to shout out, I thrashed around for a few horrible seconds before making my escape. Shaking, dripping with sweat, took me ages to calm down.
It didn't put me off ladies' bits, but I still hate bloody spiders. :oops:
A proper "Danger W*nk" then...🤣🤣🤣
 

mike_pk_waters

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I have developed a phobia over the last 20 years, it is getting worse, I have a morib fear that makes me hide in the corner like a jibbering simpleton.
The source of this phobia


THE WIFE
 
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