Coming off my meds

pies

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MAte be careful coming of those pills my step bro was on them then got taken off. His health slipped dramatically to the extent of attempting suicide. So if and when you come off them try and make sure you never alone for a bit
All the best 😀
 

Zerkalo

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Sorry to hear about your step bro. It is a slight worry for me but I'm generally well so the thing I hope for most is getting my libido back.
 

spooky1966

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I hope you and your sister finds her own peace of mind mate. Appreciate the offer. The forums have been a great help already to me.
Just be positive mate need to talk we are here sooo many reasons to be positive not that many to be negative 👍
Just need to be strong
KTF
 

rudd

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Thanks for all the well wishing. Like I say, I don't think I was ever ill so thoughts with those who are more severely impaired than me.

Just a relief more than anything and another chapter to put behind me.
That’s a very dangerous thought.
When you next see your psychiatrist, you really need to have a conversation.
 

MrBen

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Good luck, I reduced my dosages slowly, and now take a very mild one. If that’s an option it might be worth considering. It just shows how far we’ve come, that mental health is now talked about rather than the stigmatisation that it once carried.
 

rudd

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I don't follow? :LOL: What's dangerous?
Thinking you were never I’ll mate.

You admit to having being arrested by the countries security service, being sectioned and receiving professional care.

But don’t think somethings amiss.
 

MrBen

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Thinking you were never I’ll mate.

You admit to having being arrested by the countries security service, being sectioned and receiving professional care.

But don’t think somethings amiss.
Did you found fight club @Zerkalo or can’t you talk about it?
 

Zerkalo

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Thinking you were never I’ll mate.

You admit to having being arrested by the countries security service, being sectioned and receiving professional care.

But don’t think somethings amiss.
I understand now. 'Delusional disorder' was the diagnosis. I'm told by more recent psychiatrists that my 'fixed beliefs' about what happened are a common symptom of delusional disorder... but there is no admittance that it was actually MI5 that issued the warrant.

The process of being sectioned was very brief. Basically I had a knock on the door from police. The first thing I said was...

"This will be intelligence based"
"What do you mean?" They asked.
"The security services and MI5" was my reply.

I was taken to a police station and put in a cell. Then a few hours later called out to be interviewed by someone I thought was police, later turned out to be a mental health assessment team. I told them the same thing, that I knew MI5 were behind my arrest.

A few hours later I was taken out of the cell and told I was going to hospital. An ambulance came and took me to hospital where I was interviewed by a psychiatrist. He asked me why I thought I was there. I told him "I've sent malicious communications to an online newspaper and I believe MI5 have given intelligence leading to my arrest".

The interview took around 5 minutes and I should say at this point I had no firm indication that it actually was MI5 behind my arrest other than what had happened to me for the last 3 years.

I was told to sleep in the hospital. Other people were in there for similar reasons, some clearly very ill, but just as many others that had sent malicious communications, including one chap who'd sent a letter to the Queen.

I was detained for a month on the basis of a few 5 minute at most interviews with a psychiatrist. At no point did I feel like I'd been heard out, and was sectioned purely on the basis I said it was MI5.

This is the crux of the story though... on my release from hospital I had an interview with another psychiatrist who'd seen my arrest warrant. He told me it was issued by JTRIG (I'd never really heard of them) and he said himself it seemed suspicious.

I went home and googled JTRIG and it matched what had been going on to me on the internet.

When I was later questioned by police it was the same officer who knocked on my door. He admitted that the first thing I'd said to him was 'intelligence based' and that it was in fact MI5/JTRIG that issued the warrant. And so he let me off with a conditional caution.

It seems that simply implying that I was targeted by MI5 was enough to get me sectioned, which is understandable, but it turned out, as I found out after the fact... to be 100% true.

Sorry for rambling but that is in fact a long story short.
 

Zerkalo

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Good luck, I reduced my dosages slowly, and now take a very mild one. If that’s an option it might be worth considering. It just shows how far we’ve come, that mental health is now talked about rather than the stigmatisation that it once carried.
Very true mate, there's a lot of people still out there that will look down and mistrust anyone diagnosed with mental health problems but I've always thought of myself as being compassionate in that respect.
 

Zerkalo

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Best wishes to you Zerkalo for the future. I admire your willingness to tell your story very brave of you 👍
Cheers mate. Good to get off my chest now and again but is only really half of the story.
 

TrickyD

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Good luck. It's quite a thing for you to actually talk about it, and despite what people may say (jokingly I assume) keep on posting.
 

rudd

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I understand now. 'Delusional disorder' was the diagnosis. I'm told by more recent psychiatrists that my 'fixed beliefs' about what happened are a common symptom of delusional disorder... but there is no admittance that it was actually MI5 that issued the warrant.

The process of being sectioned was very brief. Basically I had a knock on the door from police. The first thing I said was...

"This will be intelligence based"
"What do you mean?" They asked.
"The security services and MI5" was my reply.

I was taken to a police station and put in a cell. Then a few hours later called out to be interviewed by someone I thought was police, later turned out to be a mental health assessment team. I told them the same thing, that I knew MI5 were behind my arrest.

A few hours later I was taken out of the cell and told I was going to hospital. An ambulance came and took me to hospital where I was interviewed by a psychiatrist. He asked me why I thought I was there. I told him "I've sent malicious communications to an online newspaper and I believe MI5 have given intelligence leading to my arrest".

The interview took around 5 minutes and I should say at this point I had no firm indication that it actually was MI5 behind my arrest other than what had happened to me for the last 3 years.

I was told to sleep in the hospital. Other people were in there for similar reasons, some clearly very ill, but just as many others that had sent malicious communications, including one chap who'd sent a letter to the Queen.

I was detained for a month on the basis of a few 5 minute at most interviews with a psychiatrist. At no point did I feel like I'd been heard out, and was sectioned purely on the basis I said it was MI5.

This is the crux of the story though... on my release from hospital I had an interview with another psychiatrist who'd seen my arrest warrant. He told me it was issued by JTRIG (I'd never really heard of them) and he said himself it seemed suspicious.

I went home and googled JTRIG and it matched what had been going on to me on the internet.

When I was later questioned by police it was the same officer who knocked on my door. He admitted that the first thing I'd said to him was 'intelligence based' and that it was in fact MI5/JTRIG that issued the warrant. And so he let me off with a conditional caution.

It seems that simply implying that I was targeted by MI5 was enough to get me sectioned, which is understandable, but it turned out, as I found out after the fact... to be 100% true.

Sorry for rambling but that is in fact a long story short.
I won’t be sending in any more letters to ‘The Suffolk Gazette’
 

Zerkalo

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If anyone wants to know how to come to the attention of JTRIG in the first place, I would/wouldn't recommend coming forward to the Mail Online with 'information' about something that might or might not have happened on a once popular film forum, at the same time as trolling their comments section with 'subversive' comments. They take themselves way too seriously as a paper and ruined my life for 3 years.
 

rudd

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Thanks for explaining your situation, good wishes on coming off meds and keep on posting.
 

Wrongfoot

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Quite the story. Just because you're paranoid doesn't mean they're not out to get you eh?

I understand that you never get to be certain about medication in your own specific case, because you don't have a second you to compare how you would have managed without the medication. Add in other therapies and it gets even more complex. Unless you had a pronounced response to a med it's hard to know whether that, changes in circumstance or the talking therapies or both had an effect.

Despite that, if your goal is to recover a life as free from medical interference as possible and to fully regain your agency in choosing you own continued treatment and support, don't dwell. Don't sound off about what might or might not have worked or whether a historical diagnosis was precisely correct. Look forward, come off the meds and watch your response carefully. Ask those close to you and your therapist to describe whether they see a change and what that change is, their opinion is another data point to consider. You might end up backtracking and start taking the meds again. That's not a failure btw.

On some levels it doesn't matter what malady others thought you had only that others now or eventually think you are well.

Keep posting, it seems you are bringing out the best of the internet, if people here are gently concerned to communicate with you and wish you well. 👍
 

rudd

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If anyone wants to know how to come to the attention of JTRIG in the first place, I would/wouldn't recommend coming forward to the Mail Online with 'information' about something that might or might not have happened on a once popular film forum, at the same time as trolling their comments section with 'subversive' comments. They take themselves way too seriously as a paper and ruined my life for 3 years.
Just read this - you may be interested
 
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