The fastest thing on Earth


Aitch, Cantankerous old gimmer with "Views"
Site Supporter
Nov 30, 2015
3 blokes in the pub and one of them says,, whats the fastest thing on Earth.. and the other bloke says,, I reckon its yer eyelid.. like a wink.. yep.. a wink is fast. , the other bloke says nope.. Its a blink, cos two eyes have got to be faster than one eye.. Then the third bloke says.. actually it's a bulb, cos when you flick the light switch, the light comes on much faster than the blink of an eye..

Just then somebody else at the bar says you've all got it wrong.. The answer is diarrhoea,, cos the other day I was asleep in bed and woke up with belly ache and before I could wink, blink, or turn the light on I'd already s!$% meself..